The Jerusalem Roast, a satirical news section on The Jerusalem Post in honor of Purim (credit: JERUSALEM POST)
The Jerusalem Roast, a satirical news section on The Jerusalem Post in honor of Purim (credit: JERUSALEM POST)
For the 256th time, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has asked the judges in his ongoing corruption trial for a delay in giving testimony due to his ongoing health issues, which have left him weak and disoriented.

After his request was granted, Netanyahu took off a day from his strenuous workload to run the Tiberias Marathon, which he finished in a record time of 2:18:32.

“It was a total victory,” said a beaming Netanyahu at the finish line.

In court, the prime minister has seemed listless, pale and has to sit down during his testimony. As soon as he leaves, his energy seems to return and he’s at his usual accelerated pace that has staffers half his age struggling to keep up.

The last time the court granted Netanyahu’s request to beg off from testifying, he flew to the US for a week of meetings with US President Elon Musk (er…. Donald Trump) and a slew of TV interviews. He was also seen dancing until the wee hours at a New York disco.

Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu attends the Tel Aviv District Court. December 24, 2024. (credit: MOTI MILROD/POOL)
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu attends the Tel Aviv District Court. December 24, 2024. (credit: MOTI MILROD/POOL)

Netanyahu suffers from jailitis

According to Dr. Itay Gal, the stark difference between Netanyahu’s courtroom appearance and his vital lifestyle outside the trial can be explained by a rare syndrome – Jailitis.

“It’s been written about in many health journals, and usually afflicts middle-aged to older men who have an unnatural fear of going to jail,” he said.